Delays, Loneliness, and confidence

Well it has been at least two weeks since i Last blogged. i'm sure some of you were wondering What had happened to me during those two weeks. Let me sum up my week in Wichita Ka, When we arrived my roommate and i took a walk to the gas station to get something to eat, she met up with some guys that were not very good and they hit it off real well. Later that week she brought the guys into our room, ( that is a strict no no in the company) while i was sleeping. I learned that i was a lot braver and more calm and collected than what i thought i was during that situation. Needless to say she got fired, i gained two new roommates during that week, one up and stole my roommate Brittney's computer and left the company. I also learned which guys, i could trust and which ones i couldn't, from the situation. The next week we moved to Lincoln, Nebraska, where i had the worst sales week ever, gained two more room mates. Brittney that had her computer stolen, found out she was pregnant and was sent home. The head manager came back from Vacation with his wife and baby daughter.  During this entire time i leaned what the meaning of loneliness really is. While i have already gone through, four roommates in the last week, i learned that i couldn't rely on them in the way that i would have liked. They either lied, caused trouble or stole. I love them and showed them kindness as i knew that Christ would. I have gained some respect from my male co-workers and friendship  Nothing replaces the fellowship of the Christian Believer, I was given the chance to go to Church during those two weeks. When i walked in i was welcomed and loved, something i hadn't realized i missed until i went. i was desperate and hungry for the preaching, something i took for granted while i was at school. during the entire week i couldn't shake the feeling that i was totally and completely alone. I couldn't share my feelings with my "friends" or my roommates. They came to me for advice and a listening ear. My college friends were busy with their own lives, and since the internet didn't work well in Nebraska i couldn't get online, what was left to me was my cell phone which didn't work during the day, due to the fact that cell reception is limited in small towns, so even asking for prayer from my parents was difficult to do. I was frustrated and sad, i would cry alone in my room or in the shower, begging God to let me talk to someone who could sympathize, or pray for me after a long day of work. My confidence in being able to do the job, was wavering, i honestly didn't think that i could do the job until, i was reminded that i cant compare myself to those that have done this job for years, i'm still training. God wants me here, I have to remember that as i wake up every single day.

Frustration, Tears and Sales

God works in very different ways than we think, or the way we want. He may guide our steps in times of frustration. all we have to do follow Him. I'm remined of Joshua and Rahab. Joshua was the successor to Moses and was probably wondering "Lord I'm not a leader" or "Lord I'm intimated by Moses cause he was a great leader", or "Lord you saw how Moses was frustrated why do you want me to do it?" Yet Joshua is one of the Great leaders of Israel. God told him not to fear, but have faith in Him. Rahab was a harlot, she was a pagan, but in her own respect she feared God when the tales of Israel reached Jericho. Why would a  harlot have so much faith that Israel's God would bring her through the battle? I pondered that early this morning, before heading out to work. My day started out with three sales talks and three almost near buys, i did not give up hope for that was my momentum. My second drop of point was two sales talks and a frustrating demonstration to a very stubborn man. By my third drop of i was getting no's rude behavior form a simple hello and lots of no shows at the doors.
I happened to walk up to a lady while she was sitting on her front porch, about ready to cry. ( at this point i wanted to cry too) I walked up to try to sell her but she shut me down right away saying she got news from the doctor, she said it was devastating. When i asked her what was wrong and asked if she wanted me to listen. I being seriously genuion, was turned down. I turned away at that point think i really wasn't cut out for this job. i was crying at this point, in my mind after i finished that drop that day i was going to tell my boss that i couldn't take this job and that i wanted to be sent home. at this point i stopped crying long enough to walk to the door compose my self and knock on the door. when the lady came out i don't know what came out of my mouth but something happened, by the end of my sales pitch i had sold one gallon of cleaner. I had been trusting God all day that i could the quota sold, but by the end of my day God had taught to just have faith even though i was frustrated , tired, and just about to throw the towel in i was brought back to the realization that God good help me sell. i was amazed.

definitions of my day

Here are some definition that i came up with for my day today i hope you like them ;)
Thirst :
Websters' Def. : a sensation of dryness in the mouth and throat caused by need of liquid.
Nina's Def: the constant need for watter, and suffering the consequences of needing bathroom breaks every 3 hours!


Pain:
 Websters' Def: a distressing sensation in a particular part of the body: a back pain.
Nina's Def: the dull aching of one's feet after six hours of walking and a new found respect for the Israelites that had to walk through the wilderness, oh and pretty much anybody that didn't have a car.


Heat:
Websters's Def: the state of a body perceived as having or generating a relatively high degree of warmth. the condition or quality of being hot: the heat of an oven. the degree of hotness; temperature
Nina's Def: The cause for thirst ( see previous definition)


Ok so i did have fun today, and i must say that God does keep His promises, these were some fun words that i wanted to look up in the dictionary to give you a slight feel for what i have to do everyday. I had the chance to give a couple of sales pitches today....lets just say i need lots of work. well another day another dollar.

Joseph, Moses and roommates

ok sooo i know some of you will  be wanting to know how my first day went. It was long and tiring. the door to door salesman has a new found respect in my book. Although they deal with a wide range of people and their attitudes, they are to be respected in a certain sense. When one is training on the job (like me) you will be feeling many different emotions. Some of those emotions are amazement that the product actually works! Other emotions, are a little more negative, especially  when they generated by your co-workers and roommates. I can relate to Joseph in a very different light now, He was a foreigner in a foreign land, being affronted by all sorts of debauchery and sin. I can only imagine how lonely he felt, but he is some one that God blessed. because He was willing to take a stand for God. Moses no doubt felt lonely in the wilderness  when the children of Israel "did what was evil in the sight of the Lord."  but both men put their faith in God daily. They were tried and tested and found faithful. Although i may not totally understand why God allowed this job to be open and available after putting my self out their to find something in my area, but i am willing to be tested and tried. As far as my roommates go...... they both have their good qualities.......... ok so this will also be a test of love for me, but it I have in some ways already seen the mission field that is plainly before me in my roommates. My hope is in the Lord, my role model is Christ, my missions field is my roommates.

first Impressions

They say that you only get one first impression of something, some one, or some where. Sometime the first impression might be horrible, but after words, you find that you like the person, place, or thing. My first impressions of the trip up to Amarillo were ones that i definitely wont forget. I wont relay in to much detail the hatred i have for buses, bus stops or dirty bathrooms. Just know i had quite an experience with all three during the trip. The first impression i had of Amarillo is, a hick town that cant even run a proper bus stop properly. Of course you have to get passed these first impressions and move on. well.........this impression was accurate. The bus stop was tiny to begin with and what made it worse was the fact that they were undergoing "renovation" (in my opinion it should have been torn down and remodeled from the ground up!). So a tiny space made tinier with 30+ people inside trying to get to there destination or trying get luggage that had disappeared as soon as the bus arrives  Oh Amarillo you shall forever go down in my book as a town that needs help! Well I arrived safely and was settled comfortably, for the most part.